Hi there, I'm Alex(andra)!
I love to write and create, and after a lifetime of trying to find my way, I finally realised
it was no paved road in a foreign land, but a rural path in my native Bulgaria.
I wanted nothing more than to leave Bulgaria
Ever since I was a child, I dreamed of living abroad — the more foreign and distant, the better. My first move was as a university student, but I came back to Bulgaria for my internship and ended up staying for a couple of years. I saw it as something I had to do for my personal growth, even though I knew I’d eventually leave again. Many didn’t believe me when I said that, but eventually, that’s exactly what happened. And it wasn’t just for any reason, but for the chance to pursue something I had always dreamt of. But finally achieving that dream of mine opened up dilemmas and realisations I honestly wasn’t prepared for.
Fast track to disillusionment
As a workaholic who finally got a chance to write for a living, my work made me proud. With time though, I started being encouraged to not set the bar too high. I was questioned on “why clients like me so much” and encouraged to pursue social politics over authenticity. I saw that friendship didn’t matter at the chance of getting ahead. Slowly and painfully, I was disillusioned with everything I thought work life was like. It was never about doing good work, but about looking good doing it. And while I tried to conform for a minute, the cognitive dissonance was way too strong. I’m just not that kind of person, and well, it showed.
Within months, I found myself in a deep depression, consumed by anxiety and unsure who to trust. I could barely function and had to take sick leave in order to try and recover. I couldn’t think or move or do anything productive, which still affects me to this day. Against my will, I had to let go of my past self and step into a new identity — one with boundaries, firm beliefs and an unwavering desire to be authentic and follow her own path no matter what life throws her way.
It was in my darkest times when I realised that coming back home healed me. There's nothing more magical than being around friends and family.
Something in me knew this, but I was afraid of realising what I know now. At first I stopped myself from going back, but once I did, I gained power that I didn't have before. And within a few months, I made a decision that would change my life forever.
I left my career dream behind to pursue a reality that's more aligned with my true self.
And now I'm here!
I finally packed my stuff and moved back to Bulgaria at the start of 2024 and haven’t looked back since. Since then, I’ve spent most of my time outside the city, traveling around Europe and meeting many who also live a life aligned with their authenticity. And I’m really grateful for it!
What can I say, all I really want is to live in a village, create more than I consume and give back to my community. Live the slow, mindful life of someone surrounded by nature who wants to discover their true nature as well. And I want to take you along for the ride, because sharing it makes it all the more interesting and worth looking back on.
Join me and discover my stories 🙂
